Sometimes in life, you have that moment when you stop and say, 'Holy crap. How did I even get here?' I think there's actually a really annoying song by Five for Fighting about that, which is now going to be stuck in my head (and yours) all day. 

At 24 years young, I kind of had that moment recently. If I could give any wisdom to moody adolescent me, who existed between my junior year of high school and my junior year of college, this is what it would be.

Shelby Taylor-Thorn/TSM
  • You know how you're sad because you don't have a boyfriend like the 'cool girls?'

    Don't worry about it, because you're having more fun than they are. You'll date a few guys here and there in college, but when you're in your early twenties, you'll get a job where you can whine about it on the air. Which leads me to how you got here...

  • Be wary of guys with colonial names.

    If they have the same name as a founding father, they're going to break up with you (and you will date more than one of them, believe it or not). But, after the first one dumps you in college, you realize you want to be in a dark room, with breakup music, and padded walls (radio).

    So date them, have fun with them, and know that every time one of those 17th century guys brings you down, you only get that much better.

    And laugh when you have to learn about them in class the next day because it's going to SUCK! (Talking about you, James Madison.)

  • Don't dye your hair blue.

    It turns green and is like, really hard to get out.

  • Your mom and dad are the best.

    You're going to move home with them for a while after college, any they'll be the coolest roommates ever because they cook for you and never make you pay for utilities.

    Make sure you let them know how much you love and appreciate them every day.

  • Your insecurities will go away, so stop using that tanning lotion.

    It's orange and it smells bad. Even though you get made fun of now, just embrace looking natural.

    Plus, believe me when I say all those white girls that laid in tanning beds in high school... already look five years older than you.

  • You're about to screw up in college, and it's OK.

    Don't share that cup freshman year. You WILL get mono, and you WILL have to drop your classes, and about ten pounds. Your boobs will not come back.

    But hey, you live and you almost die and you learn!

  • Don't cry when Matt goes away to college.

    It's OK to be sad, and afraid of change, but your big brother is going to live about 30 minutes away from you when you're older, and he'll come help you lift heavy things the six, seven or eight times you move... and everyone is going to think you're a couple.

  • Stop tweezing your eyebrows like that.

    Seriously, oh my gosh, why are you doing that?

  • Mom is totally right about everything.

    It sucks but it's true. You won't let her buy you snow boots when you're 17 because 'they're ugly,' but then one day in college, it's going to snow two feet and you're going to have to walk to the bus, and those boots your mom surprise shipped to you are really going to come in handy (even if they are ugly).

    Let that story also just be a metaphor for everything else in life she was right about, too.

  • Keep in touch with Chloe and Natalie.

    They're your childhood friends, and you'll go separate ways as adults, but they're the real deal, and they'll be there for you in your mid-twenties.

  • Love your dogs.

    They're also two of your best friends, and they might not be there for you in your mid-twenties.

  • Always remember to call Grandma every now and then.

    She's loaded with free advice and wisdom.

  • Keep marching to the beat of your own drum.

    Pun intended! Because you play the drums. But really, people are going to try to put you in a box, and you gotta say, 'F*** 'em!'

    Yeah, in a couple years you'll start swearing and you'll find it incredibly liberating.

  • Don't be so hard on yourself.

    You're going to be 'aight.