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Did a Russian Plane Carrying Tyra Banks Take Off From Randy’s in Greeley?

Michaa Krakowiak Getty Images

Once a week my hometown newspaper, the Greeley Tribune, puts together what they call their Crime Log. Basically they find the weirdest sh** that the cops encountered, and believe me there is a lot, in the town over the previous week. This week we found out that Randy’s All-American Grill in Greeley either had a plane take off in it’s small parking lot, or they serve really good drugs!

One of my top two or three favorite places to go out and eat at in Greeley is Randy’s near the King Soopers on 35th Ave. in Greeley. Whether you get the amazing French toast and chicken-fried bacon for breakfast or my buddies burger namesake, the Brian Gary Burger, for lunch or dinner, you will leave satisfied and full! That being said, I have been to Randy’s many times and although I left happy, I have never left high, and I know for damn sure that no airplanes can take off from their parking lot. Clearly something weird was going on at Randy’s this weekend…

May 10, 9:15 p.m.: A caller at Randy’s All-American Grill, 2118 35th Ave., asked to speak with someone about a Russian plane taking off with some American women, one of which was supermodel Tyra Banks. When asked for his phone number, the caller said, “Never mind, I was just told the plane took off.”

I am not accusing my friends at Randy’s of serving up mushrooms or acid, and I am also not saying that whoever called in to the cops didn’t actually see this mysterious plane… What I am saying is this sounds really weird, and those are my best guesses. You have a better explanation?

See the rest of the Crime Log here.

NEXT: Greeley Man Proves It’s NEVER a Good Idea to Send Naked Selfies

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