My grandpa always used to tell me that if I ate enough carrots it would put hair on my chest. Then my uncle told me that if I ate some peppers that were so hot they made me cry that they would put hair on my chest. Needless to say, I ate neither, and now I have a bald chest. Some call me lucky, others call me a little boy. Call me what you want, I have found the cure! 

What makes lumberjacks, 70s television stars and the giant Brown Bears of Alaska so irresistibly attractive to others? Simple. Their long, luxuriant chest hair.

For those of you not ethnic enough to grow amazing chest hair and not rich enough to afford a gold chain with a dollar sign on it, Firebox has got you covered with their “70s Hairy Chest Sweater.”

It’s yours for a mere £39.99. (Not sure how much that is in Euros.)